Rise and Shine: Creating Powerful Morning Habits for Alcohol-Free Success / EP 57

Welcome back to another invigorating episode of the Feel Lit Alcohol Free Podcast! This episode answers a listener's question:  "There's so much talk about having a morning routine, I'm struggling with this. Why is a morning routine so important?"

Remember the days when "morning routine" just meant crawling out of bed to guzzle coffee & dash to work? Today, on the pod we are diving into the transformative power of the morning routine. Join Ruby and Susan as they explore the intricacies of starting your day with intention and how it can set the tone for an alcohol-free lifestyle. Whether you're seeking to reconnect with your body and mind or experimenting with new rituals that align with your personal goals, our hosts provide insights and tips that cater to different lifestyles and needs. From simple habits like expressing gratitude upon waking to more structured routines involving meditation and exercise, this episode is packed with ideas to inspire your own morning magic.  Your morning can be a pillar of strength and serenity—discover how it might just be the key to feeling lit, inside and out. Tune in and feel inspired to craft a morning that works for you!

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Websites:
Susan Larkin Coaching https://www.susanlarkincoaching.com/
Ruby Williams at Freedom Renegade Coaching https://www.freedomrenegadecoaching.com/

Follow Susan: @drinklesswithsusan
Follow Ruby: @rubywilliamscoaching

It is strongly recommended that you seek professional advice regarding your health before attempting to take a break from alcohol. The creators, hosts, and producers of the The Feel Lit Alcohol Free podcast are not healthcare practitioners and therefore do not give medical, or psychological advice nor do they intend for the podcast, any resource or communication on behalf of the podcast or otherwise to be a substitute for such.

Transcript

Sick and tired of your love-hate relationship with wine?
Welcome to the feel it alcohol free podcast. Hi. I'm coach Ruby Williams. And I'm coach Susan Larkin. We are two former wine lovers turned alcohol freedom coaches exposing the lies about alcohol and giving you, our listeners, the tools to break free so you can feel lit. And when you're lit, you'll feel healthier, freer, and more in control of your life. So relax, kick back, and get ready to feel lit alcohol free. And don't forget, grab a copy of our wine free weekend guide after the show.

Ruby [00:00:33]:
Hello. Hello. Welcome back to the Feel It Alcohol Free podcast. Hello. And I'm gonna say the words, good morning. It is morning where I am right now when I'm recording this, but we're gonna be talking about the morning. So good morning.

Susan [00:00:48]:
Good morning.

Ruby [00:00:48]:
Hi and Hello. So, yeah, there's so much talk about having a morning routine. I mean, you've probably heard it. I've heard it.

Ruby [00:00:59]:
Yeah. So we got a question from a listener. You know, I'm struggling with this. Why is a morning routine so important? Why is it so important? Do you wanna start us off, Susan?

Susan [00:01:11]:
Well, I think it helps set the tone for your day. I think it also helps me get back in touch with my heart, my body, you know, because I tend to be a go go go person. So I could just get up and just, like, throw myself in the shower and then just go off and not, like, check-in internally with myself. You know? And then there's all the ‘sciency’ benefits that we've been hearing from, like, doctor Huberman and Mel Robbins and etcetera about getting up and getting the morning sunshine, fresh air, you know, having setting an intention, gratitude, drinking water, staying off social media, delaying coffee. I mean, you could just go on and on. Like, there's so much advice out there. So it can be tricky to go, well, what do I need to do? What do I wanna do? What feels good for me? Yeah. So it can be confusing.

Susan [00:02:04]:
Right? Right.

Ruby [00:02:06]:
Totally. There's so much. You nailed it. There's just so much advice out there. And yeah. And when I think about my morning routine when I was drinking, there wasn't really I mean, I had one, of course, but it was more like just, oh, get out of bed, you know, take off my makeup from the night before, you know, feel like crap, drink coffee as fast as I can, you know, just do the bare minimum so I could get out the door and go to work. I mean, that's what it was like.

Susan [00:02:36]:
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Assess the damage. That was the first thing to wake up and go…

Susan [00:02:42]:
How do I feel? Did I drink too much last night? If I felt good, then it was, like, a good day. Like, oh, I feel so you know, even if I had a couple glasses of wine, I would be like, oh, because I stayed within my limits. Okay. I feel good. If I didn't feel good, even if it was the same even if it was the same amount of alcohol, because sometimes it affects you differently if you've eaten, etcetera, etcetera, then it was like a bad day. Then I was bad, and I started the day off beating myself up, thinking I'm bad, assessing the damage in the mirror, you know, and just starting my day off just feeling, like, terrible about myself and beating myself up. And so, yeah, it was miserable. And yeah.

Ruby [00:03:20]:
And if you're there, you're not alone. That's No. What happens? And how did you start when you started your alcohol free journey, what was it like in the early days? And how did you get started on a morning routine?

Susan [00:03:36]:
Yeah. I had been doing the divine hours, which is a morning, like, bible study type of thing with God's word before I went through the process of really digging in and choosing an alcohol free lifestyle and going all in with it. And so that was part of it still. You know? So for me, the touch points I wanna make in the morning are god, gratitude, checking in again with my body. But there were a lot of things I learned in my early sobriety journey where I was like, oh, yeah. This really helps me. So, like, it was checking in with the group that program that I was doing. It was checking in on, like, a lesson or information, you know, like, a lot of people in an alcohol free community talk about, you know, you wake up with the intentionality of, you know, what am I reading today to help me stay alcohol free? What am I choosing, you know, writing in my journal? That kind of stuff.

Susan [00:04:36]:
So in the beginning or also doing yoga was a big one for me. So in the beginning, I think it was really important for it to be about that intentionality for my alcohol freedom because I was still changing those neural pathways. Right? So it was important to do something towards my alcohol freedom, setting the stage every morning to, like, be a pillar. I call it, like, the pillars. So what is a pillar in the morning? Do you have any pillars throughout the day that help you stay alcohol free? And then an evening routine also. So the morning pillar was very, very important in my alcohol freedom journey. And then now it's sort of morphing into a different state. You know? And and and so it's about experimenting.

Susan [00:05:24]:
And even then, it was about experimenting with what felt good and what served me and what serves my overall intentions. So that's where I come back to as far as, like, there's all this information out there, but what works for you? Again, it has to work for you.

Ruby [00:05:40]:
Want to feel? We're gonna Yes. We always get on getting back to us. Asking, how do you wanna feel? Yep. Yeah. I mean, even now, when I go through periods of stress or pipe I I I I lose my morning routine. It kinda, like, just it, like or not all the way. I still have some usually, it's not 100% gone, but I I for me, I would build on it. I didn't just say tomorrow, I'm gonna do 10 things in the morning.

Ruby [00:06:05]:
Or, actually, I probably tried that. Like, oh, you know, Mel Robbins said this, and he said that, and Susan said this, and did it. Right? So I'm gonna do all of them tomorrow morning. Well, that doesn't work for me. I mean, I might be able to do it for a couple of days or something, but then it's just too much. So I like to build on it. So I remember I would be like, okay. Gonna do one thing and then build on that.

Ruby [00:06:27]:
Get kinda get get a pattern, get it get it going, and then maybe add the next thing. But for me, I love when I learn tiny habits. And the tiny habit, the one that they even just talk about in the free, you could do this free thing with them and the second you wake up, you put your feet on the ground and you think, you know, I put my hands up. That's, like, my reward. Like, hands in the air, and I thank the universe, thank God, thank you know, I just say thank you for today. Right? It's like gratitude. That's the very first thing. And then for me, the very next thing I do, unless I have to use the restroom, but I go and I do meditation.

Ruby [00:07:06]:
And I have if you're watching YouTube, you can see my visual. My visual here, I'm gonna make room for it. I have a little tray here, and this is my meditation tray. And it's got a candle, so I wanna do all my senses when I meditate. I have a candle that smells like lemon verbena. I have a meditation singing bowl. Here, I'll

Susan [00:07:28]:
oh, I like that.

Ruby [00:07:31]:
And then I have a different scent. I have palo santo. I have sage. I have rosemary, whatever I feel like. So I'm, like, using my senses while I go into meditation. So I definitely do that. So I've got a candle, a scent, and then a sound. And then I, you know, you look at your taste.

Ruby [00:07:52]:
So part of my meditation is, yeah, I get my senses really, like, activated, and then I do my meditation. That's, like, really, really important. But, again, when I go through this is one thing that does go when I'm, like, stressed. And what do I do when I'm stressed? I might go to my phone. Like, we all probably have our when we're feeling when we're feelin' when we're good and we're not that we're judging, but, like, when we're, like, on top of everything, you know, I meditate. And then I go to the bathroom, and I drink a big glass of or, no. First, I weigh myself. Then I do a big glass of water.

Ruby [00:08:24]:
It's like always. Then I high five myself in the mirror, and, you know, like, my reward is coffee when I've done my whole morning routine. And then I listen while I'm taking a shower, which I end with a cold shower. But while I'm taking a shower, I listen to a guided meditation called Today is a New Day. It's kinda like you like an affirmation. It's like today is a new day. You “get to” experience today and the grace of today, and today is a new day.

Ruby [00:08:57]:
It's a really, really I would say that's my number one morning practice that I Yeah. Do not fail for probably 5 years. Wow. Every day. Yeah. Tell me more about your

Susan [00:09:06]:
That's so good.

Ruby [00:09:07]:
Yeah.

Susan [00:09:08]:
Oh my gosh. Well, my routine is changing. You know? Once I retired from Yale, I was, you know, going to a corporate job or going to do a job every day, right, which most people do. And so I had a routine that I did then when I retired in June and became full time coaching. I I felt like I needed time in the morning. It was like this new luxury that I hadn't had before, and I wanted what I would call this fiddle fart around time or slow mornings. Like, I wanted to be able to get up. And at that time, it was the summer, and I would go out and do my grounding, put my feet in the grass, and be in the sunshine. But this idea of, like, I was battling this, like, but, no, I have to get started with my day versus this desire, this need to probably just decompress, you know, and de stress from 20 years of that kind of lifestyle.

Susan [00:10:12]:
But I was fighting it because I kept going, no, no. I have to be productive. You know? And so that's where I come back to you really have to get something that you have to still be in tune with what you need, what you feel. And I love this from yoga with Adrianne, finding what feels good. Because if, again, back to our ‘shoulding’ episode, if you're ‘shoulding’ yourself, like, I should have a morning routine. I should meditate. I should do this. I should walk.

Susan [00:10:36]:
I should you know, you're just gonna start off with, you know, cognitive dissonance. So I think that it's really important to change it up. I mean, discipline is important as well. I could be very disciplined. So it's like this balance of what do I need? What works for me? What do I know is a pillar that sets me up for my best day? But it's similar to the exercise question, like forcing yourself to do a Peloton bike when you just don't like it. It's like finding the exercise you love. So it's like finding the morning routine you love. Exactly.

Susan [00:11:11]:
I don't love meditating first thing in the morning.

Ruby [00:11:15]:
I love it.

Susan [00:11:16]:
I know you love it, and I just am, like, too active. That just makes me I just it just I'm too squirmy. For me, meditation in the afternoon is very nourishing and relaxing, and it's, like, perfect time to take a break. But in the morning, I am raring to go, and so I would prefer I prefer I need to get into my body. And so what I do is the same thing. I do kind of a sun salutation looking out at this one window in my room on my yoga mat, praising God. You know, I put on some worship music, and I do what I call it and, you know, I'm always making up names for stuff. My own little Susanisms.

Susan [00:11:56]:
I call it ‘stroga’ because it's a combination of these stretches that, like, open up my hips and are, you know, good for my body to wake up my body and yoga poses. So I do my little struggle routine. I do a little tiny check-in with God with a I have I have done the divine hours for so many years. Now I'm doing another little daily God's word thing with Beth Moore, and it's, you know, just like a daily thing. I check-in. So I call it God ingratitude because I am trying to develop the skill of having a more grateful heart. It is something you can learn because I see that as putting my mind in the right frame of mind. So god and gratitude, ‘stroga’, but it's short because that my morning time is my most productive time, and so I wanna get to whatever, my you know, why I wanna get done that day.

Susan [00:12:54]:
I feel like it's valuable for me to either do some writing for, like, my newsletter or to do some planning for my business. You know? Yeah.

Ruby [00:13:05]:
For me, meditation, it actually gives me energy, which is interesting that you're saying it, actually, it centers me. I get into my body, and I get into my mind. I downloaded things in the morning from the universe. Like, I literally And then it sets the tone for my whole day of calm. So, when you said that, how you know, like or asked the question, what do I want to feel? And I am always searching for a calm mind because I think I am also a little, like you know? I'm like, ah. My word of the year was supercharged. Like so I like to be supercharged and have energy, but with my day, I really I'm searching for that calmness, that peace. And so I love that.

Ruby [00:13:55]:
And then my reward for life is if I do all my little things in the morning, I get my coffee. So my coffee comes kind of late. Like oh, I also wanted to mention this, you guys, for all the listeners out there and for you, Susan. I think superpower is to get ready for the day. Like, I, every day, put on my makeup, do my hair. Like, I think it makes me feel good. And it's like, if anything happens today, I look like I'm ready. Like, I'm ready.

Ruby [00:14:25]:
Like, I'm ready, like, if someone were to say Jump on a call. You're yeah. Jump on a call or you got yeah. So I just think that's yeah. Instead of I think when I when COVID hit and I was working from home and, you know, that whole, like, I just didn't care so much about getting dressed or I would have I mean, I always look good on the top, but sometimes, you know, you're wearing pajama pants or but I think just getting ready for the day is very important to me. Yeah. Yeah. It's part of my routine.

Susan [00:14:56]:
Yeah. No. I love nature. I feel calm from doing my struggle routine, and I feel calm, but it's like a calm that comes from movement, if that makes sense. Like, I

Ruby [00:15:08]:
Totally.

Susan [00:15:09]:
When I sit there and try to meditate, I get anxious. So, you know, but so for me, it's also a walk in nature, but I'm really struggling with it because it's, like, 17 degrees here right now. I have a bush. I'm missing my time out put grounding, putting my feet in the grass

Ruby [00:15:27]:
You said beach. Being in sunshine. Why don't you put your feet in the snow?

Susan [00:15:31]:
Right. So, I mean, it depends on the coldness, but, yeah, a walk. But, usually, what I try to do is take a walk as a break. So get up, do my shorter morning routine, do a little bit of work, take a break after some of the work, and then do my white walkout when it's warmed up a little bit. But the walk is also in nature. It's listening. No headphones, no podcast, maybe walking with someone and having a conversation, but being able to hear the birds. So this is my nature, and just walking is very calming.

Susan [00:16:09]:
Your mind when you're walking can just say that's when I get the downloads. You know?

Ruby [00:16:14]:
Yeah.

Susan [00:16:14]:
It's like a walking meditation. I love that. The downloads. So the evening time is when I connect more with meditation, a guided meditation where you know, that's where I start to to downshift, and meditation helps it. But I like what I've heard because we've roomed together. So I've heard your guided meditation in the morning, and I do and your morning song, which I love. That's your alarm.

Ruby [00:16:46]:
Oh, yeah. I forgot about that. You guys. It's the best song.

Susan [00:16:49]:
You could

Ruby [00:16:50]:
get a really positive song. I'll put it in the I'll try to put it in the Facebook group for you guys.

Susan [00:16:55]:
Yeah. Yeah.

Ruby [00:16:56]:
I'm excited to be happy. I'm excited. Or it's about just that you're here. You're alive, you know.

Susan [00:17:05]:
Waking up.

Ruby [00:17:05]:
Wake up and feel good. Yeah. Yeah. I forgot about that. My alarm has this beautiful song.

Susan [00:17:12]:
Yeah.

Ruby [00:17:12]:
And my nature walk is I have to take my dog out, you know, to do his business every morning. Yeah. So even if it's just 5 minutes or if I could take him for a little longer walk, the first thing in the morning is just a quick walk. But, yeah, I listen. I don't have headphones, and it's cold, and I love that time. But you know what, Susan? I do my yoga and exercise after work. Yeah.

Ruby [00:17:40]:
It’s been working really well for me. So instead of Good. Like, as soon as I'm done with my work day, I go do yoga or hot Pilates. So I think we're kinda great because we're different. Right? This emphasizes how different everybody is.

Susan [00:17:55]:
And that you need to work…

Susan [00:17:58]:
And, you know, it doesn't have to be a half hour or a 2 hour or a Right. You know, it is what works for you and what is setting you up to hit your goals and find what feels good because that's what you're gonna continue to do because it feels good for you. Like, the struggle really feels good for me to wake up, stretch my body, and listen to some worship music then helps me engage with the, you know, the the daily scripture that I that is in, you know, is in my little daily book and prayer, you know, for family members or whoever, but it's not a long routine for me. That's just not now, that's just not what's working for me. So it's it's a it's an experiment too, and it doesn't stay the same forever. Like, for me, also, some days I write, some days I don't. You know, I do a little if I feel like I've got a lot of garbage up here, then I'm like, I need to do a brain download, and I need to do that, you know, a little bit this morning.

Susan [00:18:59]:
So and then I pair that with coffee because I'm like, oh, I'll have my coffee and do my little writing. 

Ruby [00:19:06]:
A lot of people do that.

Susan [00:19:08]:
Yeah. Yeah.

Ruby [00:19:09]:
Yeah. I think that we can't emphasize enough that morning routines change, and morning routines morph. You feel you need something for a while. You need more, maybe really strenuous exercise, first thing for a while in your life, but then that's not what you want anymore. You want meditation. I mean, there's so many different things you can try. I did a group once that was called, I'm drawing a blank, but it has the morning pages in it. And

Susan [00:19:41]:
Oh, yeah. The Artist's Way.

Ruby [00:19:42]:
The Artist's Way. I did a group with The Artist's Way going through the book, and it was amazing to do that. But I didn't keep it up. I mean, maybe I'll go back to it because actually it was really enjoyable, but that took, like, 45 minutes of, you know, more of my morning. So it didn't quite work out with my lifestyle now. So, yeah, do what works for you.

Susan [00:20:05]:
I think it's important to have one, but it's important to find the one that works for you. And then you can look at the science, and you could see the science behind sunshine or grounding and and then try it, see how it feels. Like, I remember trying to force myself to meditate in the mornings. Like, I have to do this. I should do this. Everybody says that you should do this, and it just wasn't working for me, but I then ended up beating myself up or shooting myself, and so that's just counterintuitive. So

Ruby [00:20:37]:
you know?

Susan [00:20:37]:
And I like your idea of starting with one thing, and this is the tiny habit thing. If you don't have any routine, like you said, don't start with 10 things. Just start with one thing and then get into the habit of doing that one thing. And then and then does this feel good? Is this what you wanna do? And then I'm gonna, maybe next week, try a different thing. And then does this feel good? And then do these two things feel good together? Yeah.

Ruby [00:20:59]:
And include a beverage. You can have it stacked too. Or Yeah. For me, it's like I go into the bathroom in the morning, and it's it's, like, it's just, like, little triggers. Now it's almost like brushing my teeth. Like, use the restroom. I weigh in. Now, some people, I don't like to weigh every day.

Ruby [00:21:15]:
I love to, like, just monitor it. It's just like something that's like putting something like, what you what you track or what you monitor and track. You can notice if something's going so I weigh myself. I drink big thing of water like this. Mhmm. Bring one into the bathroom with me and I can't leave the bathroom. And when I'm done drinking, that's when I go, high 5. So then I'm happy.

Ruby [00:21:37]:
But I think the easiest, like I said, that one of the easiest first routines you could even do is just when your feet hit the ground in the morning, you you you the first thing is like gratitude, whatever that means for you. You just take it easy and then celebrate. So part of Tiny Habits is celebration. So for me, celebrating is putting my arms up or high-fiving the mirror, you know, whatever that looks like for you.

Susan [00:22:02]:
Yeah.

Ruby [00:22:02]:
Simple. Well, this is the fun part of our podcast, Susan. I know we talked a lot already about what feels good in the morning, but what do you do to feel free?

Susan [00:22:16]:
Well, I wanna make one point before we shift to that in your early alcohol free journey, it really is important to have something every morning that sets you up for staying alcohol free for the day, whatever that is. If it's listening to a podcast, you know, reading, you know, some quitlet or if you're doing a program, doing the work for the program. You know what I mean? Watching the video or reading a little something or just connecting with it, I used to do this through the divine hours, this prayer at the end, and at the very end, I'd say, Anne, help me not drink today.

Susan [00:22:55]:
What do I mean? It was like setting that intention. So I think it is really important in early alcohol freedom to have something in your morning that sets you up for success, anyway, as that pillar. And experimenting with the other things too, but that's where some of the early alcohol freedom, you know, that's where I think it really is important to have a pillar, some sort of pillar in the morning that sets you up for success. And one of those can be what I'm gonna share for what my field is that I've been doing. If you've worked with me at all or even on the podcast, you know I am the sticky note queen. I'm the one saying always write that on a sticky note, Put it on your mirror and look at it every day and read it to yourself. And I do that, too. I practice what I preach.

Susan [00:23:42]:
Me too. I have, like, 3 sticky notes on things that I'm working on for myself. I guess you can call them affirmations. They are affirmations. For me, they are me working on rewiring some negative thoughts, which we've talked about on the podcast, and just reminding myself kind of of my word of the year, which is abundance and trust. And so one of my sticky notes is, oh, I am trusting God. I feel abundant. So it's like waking up and just reminding myself that my word is trust, my word is abundance, and going through that sequence.

Susan [00:24:22]:
I love that. From this book called Feelings Buried Alive Never Die. This sequence of I I choose, I feel I am. So I'm choosing to trust, I feel abundant, or I feel secure, or I feel calm, or I feel peace, and I am confident, like and you come up with the the the sequence that works for you, and that's rewiring this old, I'm doing it wrong or, you know what I mean, that I had, you know, I could fall into. So it could be anything that is your morning you know, could be, I choose to be alcohol free. I feel you know what I mean? It could be whatever works for you right from whatever word you're choosing or whatever your intention is. I chose to feel alive today. I choose gratitude.

Susan [00:25:19]:
I choose you know? And then how does and then how do you feel? And then it's an identity. I am. It's claiming. You know how often we say I am tired. I am this. It's like we're claiming that as ourselves.

Ruby [00:25:34]:
Love that one. Claim. Claim.

Susan [00:25:37]:
But we don't wanna claim those things. So what are we claiming? Yeah. Claim what you want. Claim what feels good. Claim the identity that you want. Yeah. I am so pure. I am positive.

Susan [00:25:48]:
I am grateful. I am so it's like choosing this. I feel this. I am this to make up your own affirmations, or I don't even really call it an affirmation, but it is a rewiring of my thoughts. And so that's where when people have a breakthrough, let's say, when I'm doing a rewiring of a thought work with a client and we have a new thought, which is like, no. Alcohol makes everything worse. I'm like, write that down and look at it every day. Alcohol makes everything worse.

Susan [00:26:18]:
That's the new neural pathway because then the little voice goes, oh, it's okay. Just have one. It'll make you feel better. It'll help you handle this better, da da da da. But now the truth is alcohol makes everything worse, and so you have to keep grooving that new neural pathway. And so having a sticky note reading it so on my mirror every time I brush my teeth.

Ruby [00:26:39]:
I love it. I use sticky sticky pads too, Post its everywhere. I think it's really helpful. I use that too with clients. I love it. Yeah. Susan, thank you so much for sharing that daily affirmations with sticky notes. Affirmations with sticky notes.

Ruby [00:26:55]:
I think it’s going to help a lot of people, a lot of our listeners. It's a really powerful tool to use. And please share your morning routines with us. We gave you just some of our ideas. There's a million out there, like we said. And so you get to choose what feels good for you. And again, it can just set your intention for the day. And there's proven science behind, setting a morning routine.

Ruby [00:27:18]:
It could be as easy or a light touch as possible or it could be hours long. I mean, I've heard I've heard it all. So thank you so much for listening, and we'll see you next time.

Thanks so much for listening to the Feel Lit Alcohol Free Podcast. Do you have a question you'd like us to answer on the show? All you need to do is head over to Apple Podcasts and do 2 simple things. Leave a rating and review telling us what you think of the show. And in that review, ask us any questions you have about breaking free from wine or living an alcohol free lifestyle. That's it. Then tune in to hear your question answered live. Don't forget to grab your copy of a wine free weekend at www.feellitpodcast.com
And remember, do something today that will help you feel lit. See you next time!